Its a tough life

Good News first - My internet connection is finally setup. Yippppeeee!

Bad News second - I have still not been able to catch up on catching on with people who want to catch up with me! So, I have a backlog of emails, phone calls, sms which keeps on increasing due to my increased lethargy in increasing my communication agenda...(Forgive me for the stupid play of words - after a long long time I am writing peacefully on my blog!)

Tough News - I had to take and act on a very tough decision today. Something which was very difficult for a person like me and who tried to avoid it to the last possible moment. This is the problem with me - I avoid trying to act on negative situations and it builds up and when I finally do act, the situation has generally already become very messy and my reactions messier. I am not good at being strict and am not at all dictatorial and these are sometimes the only requirements for some tasks. I have been disturbed about it since yesterday and thinking about it through the day but accepting my failings on my blog has already made me feel a bit better.

And now I realize again - something I keep doing periodically - the crucial importance of blog in my life (sadly neglected during the last few months) - it is always there for me - to listen unconditionally to me - and then I feel I don't need anyone else as long as I have this. (Which reminds me of someone telling me that the biggest problem with me is that I dont need anyone)....by the way why is it that we treat precious things so insensitively - my blog being the case in point - I stay away from it for really long periods of time!

Life is tough - and keeps on getting tougher as you grow older. You cannot avoid responsibilities, fights, distasteful tasks - you are carried away in the current whether you like it or not. Sometimes it seems that life has become a string of bad things. But maybe I am not looking at the rainbow from the right angle - and hence unable to see it in all its glory. Just being able to spend each day with dad is the biggest blessing I have and I am very thankful to God for it. And for this thought, the changes he is emotionally blackmailing me to make seems almost worth it.

The only way to deal with this is keep your fingers crossed and pray to God to take you through each day. And now I really understand what "taking each day as it comes" means.